Alas, poor blog, I knew thee but shortly....
It is in the works, but not completely finished, as i announce my movement from this blog to a new livejournal (thank you free hosting!). More will be posted as it nears completion... as for now, this will be one of two final messages.

-Artanis Out-

Interuption...
Sorry to inturrupt our saga on California, but I'm headed for Boy Scout Camp tomorrow morning @ 6:00AM. IF you want to get in touch with me, write me at this address (format exactly as follows):

Spanish Trail Scout Reservation
(Insert My Name), Troop 371
315 Pat Covell Road
DeFuniak Springs, Florida 32433

I hope to hear from you guys! See ya in a week!

-Artanis Out-

Endeavour: California (Pt. 2)
Mood:  cool
Even though technically this is coming after the trip is completed, bear with me. I didn't have much access to a computer with GOOD internet capabilities. So here is the first half of week one:

So here we are... California. Quite a different world compared with life in Louisiana. For one thing, alot more latino and spanish speaking peoples. Got to interact with a few of them as they were installing my sister's new wood floor where her disgusting white carpet had been. They stuck around for the first two days and then we had the floor to ourselves and we spent the day putting felt on the bottom of furniture. Ooooboy. Felt. Anyway... the next day we actually started our road trip away from base camp (my sis's house). We went to northern california to Lassen Volcanic National Park and that was quite an experience. First off, we were approximately 10,000 ft up (not condusive for cajuns) and there was snow! In June! It was awesome! So we explored the entrance of the park for an hour, but by then it was too late to stay much longer and so we went to stay at a little lodge nearby called the Lassen Mineral Lodge. No phone, tv, or computer. Very comfy and simple though. It had its own restaurant (best hamburgers evar!), general store, gift shop, and hotel all in one. Perfect for the middle of nowhere. So we played scrabble and went to bed. Next day, we explored the park with its steam vents, magma fields, mud pots, and all sorts of other volcanic features. Played more in the snow and tried to climb the volcano. Didn't get too far though because the snow was too thick and all we had were tennis shoes. I don't recommend that to anyone. Thats all for now though. Join us again for first week part two: Mt. Shasta and my sister's graduation. L8er.

-Artanis Out-

Endeavour: California (Pt. 1)
I am now in California as of about 9:00 CDT and 7:00 PDT. This trip here was pretty interesting (did I mention I hate airplanes?) but we made it none the less. After a while I'll come back with more information, but for now, this will have to suffice. We are headed to the store with my sister and her friend Angel (at whom's house we're staying). TTYAL.
-Artanis Out-

Four Days to Answer...
Today is the day where the pain sets in and the choices flutter in my mind. Today I am lost in the sea of where my future leads. Everything a jumbled mass of wonder. Will I go to LSMSA or not? What will I do for my friends here? Which way is life heading me? I love my friends... I truly do. Truly there are a few I love more dearly, but in all i love them all. Yet, i want this opportunity. I'm lost on where to go. I imagine life coming back to visit and no one worries about me anymore. I become another face. Is this my destiny? Too many questions... four days to find an answer.

-Artanis Out-

Trudgng Through Life....
In light of recent events, I have been unable to update this thing for sometime, yet I've managed to find a window of opportunity and so here I write. Why has it been so long, you ask? Its quite simple really... three essays for english, one for biology, a test in civics, seven assignments for algebra II... the list goes on unending. This weekend I still have to prepare for a mock trial in civics and do twenty newspaper article summaries for Biology. I just want sleep though... I've only had 6 hours the past three days... not a pleasent feeling. I'm about to go crash after I finish this.

Tommorrow I take the ACT practice test at the library... this should be interesting...

Well, on another more somber note, today was the last day for seniors. I never realized how many senior friends I actually had and its quite a heartening feeling. I'm really going to miss them all... a lot. A Helluva lot. I hope they make it farther in life beyond their wildest dreams. I'm gonna miss you guys:

Jeremy Eusea
Jared Eusea
Molly Dubois
Shane
Beka aka Raivyn
Jeff Mahan
Shawn Granier
Brandon aka Brandy
Daniel McMillian aka Goofy
Ben Botnick
Helen Pierce
Blaine Faucheux
Amy Nicholas
-and last but in no way the least-
Sara Richoux

Today is for you guys. Tomorrow is forever yours. Embrace it. God's speed to all of you in your journeys through life and good luck. You will be missed.

-Artanis Out-

Truly Unknown...
I've found a glich in my matrix... love. For me, this is a topic that I've been enduring for some time and never truly thought to place my thoughts down. I've had the troubles and hardships throughout my life from crushes to really wonderful girlfriends, but I still believe its a large misunderstanding. When I love, I give my heart away, though not willingly. I am very jeolous with whom I actually love. Reflecting back to my actual girlfriends, I believe out of the five, I have only loved two. Thats not to say I just led the other three on, its just that there was some circumstance that kept me from loving them. My mind plays a huge role in whom I love too. Never have I asked someone out purely on one or even ten qualities alone. I try to find at least 50 great qualities, no less. I put an effort into all aspects of love too. I try to be there when I'm needed and around even when I'm not to show I care. I believe strongly in the principles of chivalry and because of my jeolous love, I am very shy even in a trusting relationship. My trust comes after I kiss. A kiss to me is the pinacle of when I truly trust a girl with everything, including my life. If I love, its because I know that this girl, whomever I'm with, is truly and utterly amazing to me, means so much to me, and I also know that the same relates for them. Some people could swear on their lives that I am a manic obsessive though when it come to love, but I know that is false. I love because love is the bond that is never broken ever. You don't fall out of love, it just doesn't happen. If I'm going to love someone, it is always forever no matter what happens. Love is the most powerful emotion on the face of the planet next to pain. I don't fool around with love and never has it gotten to a point where I didn't truly control it. I look at love through the eyes of the beloved, and its saddens me to see how few understand my views. I'm an individual though... an individual who sincerely loves only and forevermore.
-Artanis Out-

A mind in confliction...
Ever had that overwhelming feeling you lied to yourself about something? I have and it was right, I had lied. Unfortunatly that lie has caused an even greater problem that I do not have the power to fix. Its a lie to myself that turned into a lie for another person who considered it truth. Now when people believe something strongly as truth, it is hard to change their mind back without them getting mad that you aren't just changing the story completly to make yourself look better. This is not my case though... I truly lied to myself under the pretense of submission that blinded reason. I don't know why I said it, but it may be too hard to change back now. Its probably impossible. I should just forget it, but I'm not willing to loose a friend over something like this... and yet I am powerless. My mind is in total confliction.......

Small Triumphs on a Larger Battlefield...
Today, I unveiled the improved me that has reduced me back to how I was. I have returned to the person who believed in everything that made sense no matter what anyone said. I am an individual, a seperate mind from all others, and so I shall think as that one mind. I have returned to my first passionate love... writing realistic fiction stories and poetry from the inner soul. Life is a happy place all of a sudden when I think about those. And I realize now that everything in my past now: relationships, friends, arguements, compliments, and love I had for one special individual are now just that... the past. And to live in the past is to stagnate. I live for the future once again. I live for what can and will be. I live for what I love... and what I love will come to me someday. I know it.

The Morning After...
Well here is a random change of events... today i am actually updating this thing from the beginning of first hour in my computer architecture class. Seems different, but still have to say what i must.

Today is rather solemn in the way things are starting out today. I gave up my usually routine of standing with Ashley in the hall till the bell in the attempt to rid myself of certain feelings. Ironically, this will be the final time i ever bring these feelings up since I don't feel this matters in my life anymore and will prevail over it. Sometimes its just time to say i don't care anymore, end the chapter I'm on, and turn the page to get a clean start on things. I shall not fail and no, to all of you out there (and thanks for hving faith in me BTW) no, i shall not be comitting suicide anytime soon. God, you people are even worse than i if you believed that. Anyway, i should probably start paying attention to class now. Just had to get this stuff off my conscience. Later.
-Artanis Out-